The Silent Struggle - Navigating anxiety in a world that may not understand
For a lot of us, anxiety exists beneath the surface and is not very visible like other illnesses can be. Whilst anxiety influences our thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations in ways that can be overwhelming, no-one else would necessarily know.
Expressing this struggle to others, particularly in professional settings, can feel daunting. Many individuals with anxiety wrestle with shame, fear of judgment, and the vulnerability that comes with admitting that they are struggling.
Anxiety is often an invisible battle - one that those who suffer from feel deeply, but one that others may struggle to grasp.
The fear of being misunderstood
I hear many clients speak about the frustration that their anxiety is, at times, merely seen as “worrying too much” or “overreacting” by others. It’s difficult to open up anyway, but when we add this kind of perception into the mix, it can be a challenge to convey how we’re feeling without seeming as though we’re overreacting, when all we’re trying to do is describe or explain how we feel or seek support.
Don’t even get me started on responses like, “just relax”, “stop worrying”, or “don’t overthink it”! These can feel dismissive, leaving us feeling more isolated and definitely less likely to open up again.
The reality is that anxiety is not a choice or a fleeting moment of stress - it is an ongoing state that can affect every aspect of a person’s life, including their ability to function at work.
The shame and vulnerability of admitting anxiety
Admitting to anxiety can bring about a deep sense of vulnerability. Many of us worry about being seen as weak, incapable, or unprofessional, especially in at work and especially in some companies that are ‘toxic’. What I mean by using the word toxic, this is that some companies have a poor attitude to mental health and cannot see the benefits of appropriate mental health support on their employees and the company as a whole. There’s an unspoken fear: What if my colleagues or manager see me differently? What if I’m passed over for opportunities because of this?
This fear can lead individuals to suppress their struggles, attempting to push through their symptoms in silence, without seeking support. Unfortunately, ignoring anxiety doesn’t make it go away - it often exacerbates the problem, leading to burnout, exhaustion, and even worsening mental health.
How anxiety can impact work performance
For those managing anxiety, work can become extremely challenging. Deadlines, social interactions, performance expectations, and even open-office environments can heighten symptoms. Anxiety may affect your work performance in these ways:
Difficulty concentrating due to racing thoughts. This might make it hard to meet deadlines as you are distracted and unfocused in your work.
Physical symptoms like dizziness, nausea, or muscle tension making it hard to focus. This might mean additional time off, which you then feel guilty about.
Avoidance of meetings or presentations due to social anxiety. This may affect your reputation, being asked to ‘step-up’ in future, or even promotion prospects.
Perfectionism leading to overworking and burnout. Again, this may affect time off and your mental health more generally.
Fear of feedback or criticism impacting confidence. Even when I’ve seen clients who have told me they have a supportive company regarding mental health, the stigma around experiencing anxiety is still enough to affect how they are confident in their work.
Despite these challenges, many individuals hesitate to communicate their struggles, fearing negative repercussions or a lack of understanding.
How to convey the severity of anxiety at work
If anxiety is affecting your job, finding a way to communicate your needs is crucial. Here are some ways to approach the conversation professionally:
Frame anxiety as a manageable condition: Instead of focusing solely on struggles, highlight strategies you use to manage your anxiety. This reassures employers that you are proactive in maintaining your wellbeing and performance.
Be specific about accommodations that help: Whether it’s flexible deadlines, a quieter workspace, or the ability to take short breaks when needed, advocating for small adjustments can make a significant difference to your ability to manage your anxiety at work.
Use professional language: Rather than saying “I’m anxious all the time,” you might say, “I experience high levels of stress that impact my focus, and I’m working on strategies to manage it effectively.” Although, there should be no shame in sharing that you experience anxiety at times, it certainly may help others understand you better.
Reassure and educate: If your employer lacks awareness of the impact anxiety can have, offering insight into how it affects you and its symptoms can be helpful. You might say, “Anxiety can sometimes make it difficult to concentrate, but I’ve found that breaking tasks into structured steps helps me stay on track.”
Consider seeking HR or mental health support: If you’re struggling to communicate with a direct manager, HR or an employee assistance program (EAP) can provide guidance and support. I’ve worked with many clients considering taking sick leave or on sick leave - they have all struggled with the guilt of being absent and any extra burden they may place on colleagues. Notice this feeling, but please recognise it is so important for you to take your needs seriously for your recovery and wellbeing.
Changing the conversation around anxiety
The more we talk about anxiety openly, the less power shame and stigma hold over us. Mental health is just as important as physical health, and many workplaces are understanding the importance of focusing on the mental health and wellbeing of staff and how this leads to a healthier, more productive work environment.
If you’re struggling with anxiety at work, know that you’re not alone. While it may feel risky to open up, seeking understanding and advocating for yourself can lead to better support, reduced stress, and ultimately, a healthier work experience.
The key takeaway? Anxiety does not define your worth or your capability. Anxiety is simply a part of your current experience, one that deserves acknowledgment, understanding, and compassion.